today wake up at 10.30am ... than dunno what to do.. so went blogging awhile.. i guess im going to do some housework.. =P.. so zhun sia.. everytime i wake up.. sure rain... i guess god is crying with me too.. hahahahahhahahhahahahahaha whatever la.. so ya.. after i have done my housework core.. i will be back to blog !..
ok so.. i've done all my housework.. haha.. not homework.. its housework.. yapp.. wanna know what i do.. alot.. haha.. let's see.. sweeping the floor.. after that mop floor.. after floor dry.. clean with dry mop again.. arranged living room table items.. clearing all my house dustbins.. oh ya.. and washing all my house fans.. lastly changed my bedsheet.. was so tired.. lol.. but i dun mind.. you must be thinking im a weird guy.. all these housework core should be done by a girl or housewife.. haha.. im just opposite.. i dont love doing it.. but its one of my habit already.. my mom needs to work.. and we dont have a maid.. so i'll help her whenever i can.. my relative and neighbour got say.. next time i get a wife.. my wife sure good life no need do housework.. coz i know how to do.. hahahaha whatever la.. now times are different.. not many guys out there are llike me.. even now adays.. girls also same lah.. like my sister.. she's A GIRL.. but hate doing those housework.. and so on.. i tell her.. next time u grow up have your own family.. than u know what is that.. LOL !.. everything is so different now.. sometimes i think that im a girl.. but not.. haha.. how i wish im a girl.. let guys take care of me can liao.. no more troubles.. anyway girls will always have advantage lah.. so good.. im so jealous of GIRLS.. BUT my this life want me to be a boy.. so .. yea.. let it be lah !..
k lah.. abit tired after doing housework cores.. but at least there's something to do.. so i wont think about my problem again.. hahaha. i tried not to think.. continue my work.. hahhaa.. yea!! i even dance when mopping the floor! hahahahaa ! this is how i replace all my loneliness, my sadness,.. i tried to do what i do.. and i wont think.. but later in the night agian.. as usual for the past 10 + years .. i would start thinking again all the things again.. sian.. everyday sleep also got problem.. been inside my life for 10 years+.. till now its still the same.. haiz.. i have no one to talk to.. all i could do is lie on my bed.. think.. sad.. hurt.. disappointed.. and tears will automactially flow out from my eyes every night when i tried to sleep..
okay.. enough of this.. i'll keep it to myself.. since i have been doing this for so long time.. no body cares for me.. no body is around for me.. im too lonely.. K well.. i updated my blog.. i uploaded alot of new songs.. those songs suits me.. haha.. dun worry all are sad slow songs.. no fast song.. no techno songs.. no trance.. so if you dont like the current song.. just refresh the page or pressing F5 on your keyboard.. to refresh the page.. another song will load.. haha.. but some song got higher percentage of repeating.. coz i set it.. hhaa... ps ah.....
so.. today my mom cooked.. very nice lah.. she dont normally cook so well one.. but she knows that im in trouble.. or what.. so i dunno la.. when i have time.. than i tell her what happen la.. since she dunno what's blog.. or internet well.. so she dont know all these.. i've been keeping from her since i was small..
hahahaa.. i really duno what i am doing la.. my road now is going in circle and circle.. people walk straight road and seek things.. i walk in circle.. i dont know what im doing also.. i reallly dunno.. my mind is blank.. very empty.. do this also no mood.. eat also can have no appetide.. i dunno what's my life about la.. many times i will think of those troubles i kept.. those sadness.. those sad things.. when im alone.. when im not alone.. i'll just act la.. nothing happen.. im fine.. when im alone.. im different.. i feel so dark.. i dunno how to say.. i just feel very lonely.. hahahaahahahahaaa.. see im sot already.. becoming mad .. LOL.. but that's me if you know me.. i will LOL all the time.. HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAA..
sian ah.. sian ah.. im so sian.. so empty minded.. i dont know what to do.. there's no meaning in my life.. im just like a robot.. day by day.. till im gone.. haiz.. sian.. sian.. what can i do??.. who can solve my problems that i've been keeping for decade.. HELLO ANYONE OUT THERE !! HELP ME.. !
k lah.. later than i write if can la.. if not im going on my bed soon.. i hope i wont wake up.. all my troubles, my sadnesss..... my lonelinesss will be goneeeeee.. that's great!.
ok i didn't sleep long.. i woke up at 11pm.. i can't sleep.. i was so scared.. i keep waking up.. haiz.. i dont know what to do now.. im so blank.. im so hurt.. im so lonely.. im so sad.. i cried but there are no tears anymore soon.. im so hurt.. yet so lonely.. haiz.. who can feel my pain?? no one... im really very tired.. very tired.. let me go.. just let me go.
